If you could get in a time machine and move to the past or the future, which would you choose?

I bet the overwhelming majority would choose the past.  It’s familiar and we are nostalgic, sentimental creatures.  We keep good memories close to our hearts. After all, when loved ones move on, all we have left are memories.

While it is a wonderful thing to remember the past and honor it, we can go overboard.  Our longing for the good old days can cause us to become prisoners in our own minds, unable to escape because the world has changed.

Our focus on the past can become so obsessive and overwhelming that it ruins our lives.

You must move forward.  The past is gone, it is written, it is past.  The future remains to be written.  In order to write your future and let go of the past, here are four pitfalls to avoid:

Rose-Colored Glasses

The problem with our recollection of the past (and all history in general) is that it’s all based on memory.  Our minds are faulty machines.  We remember what and how we want to.

Whether out of emotional reasons or just plain forgetfulness, we see the past as we wanted it to be and not necessarily how it actually was.  The stories we tell ourselves about how great the “good old days” were can block us from moving forward.

Guilt

Perhaps you don’t see the past with rose-colored glasses. Maybe instead you repeat over and over in your mind a wrong you committed against another.

Guilt and regret will weigh you down and impede your progress.  In order to write your future, you must make peace with the past.  Apologize to the person you hurt.

Set it right, absolve yourself of the guilt and move on.  I know from personal experience that restitution will set you free.  The future needs you.

Longing

I watched an interesting nature show a few weeks ago about chameleons.  Did you know their eyes operate independently; that they can look in two directions at once?

We humans are not built that way.  We can only look in one direction.  The problem with looking backward is that you can’t look forward.

Moral Outrage

Religion is useful when it propels us to improve our lives and to help others.  Unfortunately, it can lead us to spite the world, to withdraw and focus on “better times”.

Let me explain:

A few weeks ago, my wife and I were socializing with some friends.  While discussing current affairs, the topic of Lady Gaga came up.

One of my friends had never heard of her, so we played a music video as an introduction.

After a few minutes, he replied, with a sigh of disgust, “The world is such a wicked place.”

Now, I’ll admit, Lady Gaga is definitely not the poster child for moral behavior, in fact, I find most of her antics downright repulsive.

But to make such a sweeping generalization about the current state of the world got me riled.

The world is an amazing place.  Every day we are finding cures to diseases, prolonging life and improving the status of previously under-served classes (women, minorities, etc.).

Believing that the past was so righteous and that today the world is so irredeemably wicked causes us to withdraw and close our minds.

The Future Needs You

Please, do not focus on the past to the exclusion of your future.  Part of living an uncluttered, free life includes liberating yourself from guilt, longing for the “good old days”, and focus on the evils of today.  The future needs you.

To paraphrase Tony Robbins, you are more than just your biography.

What parts of your past prevent you from enjoying the future? How do you overcome them?